The Best of Times, The Worst of Times

Sometimes I think of Dickens’ famous opening line in A Tale of Two Cities …. “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.” Doesn’t that summarize our lives when we face a crisis with God alongside us? Sometimes in the most despairing life battle when others would think it was the worst of times, God is present and revolving the worst of time into the best of times.

Had I never known the ugly face of leukemia, I never would have known the love, presence, strength, courage, and faithfulness of God. Never. Certainly for me, it has been the best of times, it has been the worst of times.

Times have been good as I have grown in my relationship with the Lord. I lived too many years only hearing and knowing about God. I didn’t truly know God. There is a cavernous difference between these two ideologies. I yearn for relationship (with God) and not religion. I read of the antics of the Pharisees in the Bible and I want to flee from anything in my life that even mimics the religiosity of the Pharisees.

Times have been bad fighting cancer. There is no way to sugar-coat a disease such as cancer. It is disgusting. It is revolting. It rips and tears at my body. It erodes my ability to fight infection and bacteria and fungi wait to invade at a moment’s notice. Needles repulse me anymore. Literally thousands of needles have pierced my skin in the last 12 years.

Times have been good as I have realized that my suffering has paled in comparison to the suffering my Savior endured for each of us. A needle piercing and probing my veins for a sample of blood ….. how dare I complain when I think of the flogging, scourging, and crucifixion that Jesus endured?

Times have been bad as fear taunts and teases me. The enemy of this world would love to evict me from my earthly vessel. He mocks my faith and me and flashes death thoughts across my mind. He attempts to derail me from my faith-walk. He will not succeed.

Times have been very good when I reflect on the innumerable times the Lord has rescued me. I have cried to Him from hospital beds and He has moved speedily. I have called to Him during the middle of the night as my body is wracked with pain. He has provided relief.

These have been the best of times, these have been the worst of times.