Self-Confessed Transplant Wimp

Since diagnosis, I have referred to myself as the “Self-Confessed Transplant Wimp”. Just the mention of a stem cell transplant sends shivers up my spine. Over the leukemic years, I have researched and read about transplants, but I tend to spit the information out and never digest it. I have watched other relatively young leukemia patients dive into transplant, only to be dead in a short amount of time. Recently, a man (who I knew from Ohio State) died during transplant. He left his wife and young children. The statistics do not offer much more incentive to sway my transplant intentions.

Do you ever stop to consider what you would do, if you were faced with this dilemma? A typical transplant doctor surmises, “Without a transplant, there is a 100 percent chance you are going to die.” In that context, the 30 or 40 percent chance of transplant mortality or morbidity looks like impressive odds. What a deal!

Then there is the matter of locating a matched unrelated donor. That process has been initiated. My blood was drawn at the NIH and HLA typing will be completed. HLA stands for human leukocyte antigen. HLA typing identifies the specific antigens on white blood cells that will determine if a donor’s stem cells are perfectly matched to my HLA markers. Once my HLA markers are determined, that information will be put into the national database of the National Marrow Donor Program. This will generate a list of potential donors who are a 10 out of 10 match (my HLA antigens match their HLA antigens). Some transplant centers will transplant with a 9/10 match but that further complicates the transplant’s outcome.

IF there are any confirmed matches, then these matched individuals will be contacted. Some may have died or moved. Others may have health challenges that will prevent them from donating. And for others, when the rubber meets the road and they are called upon to be a donor, suddenly that is not an appealing consideration. Unlike organ donations where cadaver organs are often transplanted, the stem cells are harvested from a living donor for this type of transplant.

Once in awhile, I close my eyes and allow my mind to wander to the transplant unit where I’ve survived the transplant and the leukemia has been pummeled to death. For that moment, transplant begins to lure and tempt me to consider. I have had leukemia for so many years, that I cannot even recall life without leukemia, pain or infections. I cannot even fathom life without this daunting invader in my body.

To transplant or not to transplant, that is the question at hand ……