Parents and grandparents need to be vigilant with regard to the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child(CRC). Please bring yourself up to date on this threatening treaty of the United Nations. This treaty, a looming threat to parents and their rights, is nothing new - I recall rallying against this UN proposal, in the 1990's as we home schooled our children and wanted to defend that right that we cherished as parents (in addition to numerous other parental rights).
Madeline Albright, past U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations, signed the Convention on the Rights of the Child on behalf of the United States, however, the treaty was never sent to the Senate for ratification. This treaty looms again over our nation as the likes of Senator Barbara Boxer supports its ratification by our government.
Two vital aspects of this treaty are:
Government can override parental decisions on the best interest of the child without proof of abuse, neglect, or harm.
Children have legally enforceable rights to complain about parental decision-making in every area of their life, including religious and educational decisions.
To review this treaty in its entirety, go to: http://www.un.org/documents/ga/res/44/a44r025.htm
An excellent summary of this frightening proposal is offered on the HSLDA website, written by Michael Farris, JD. In part, this summary states:
Ten things you need to know about the structure of the CRC:
It is a treaty which creates binding rules of law. It is no mere statement of altruism. (1)
Its effect would be binding on American families, courts, and policy-makers.(2)
Children of other nations would not be impacted or helped in any direct way by our ratification. (3)
The CRC would automatically override almost all American laws on children and families because of the U.S. Constitution’s Supremacy Clause in Article VI. (4)
The CRC has some elements that are self-executing, others would require implementing legislation. Federal courts would have the power to determine which provisions were self-executing. (5)
The courts would have the power to directly enforce the provisions that are self-executing.(6)
Congress would have the power to directly legislate on all subjects necessary to comply with the treaty. This would be the most massive shift of power from the states to the federal government in American history.(7)
A committee of 18 experts from other nations sitting in Geneva has the authority to issue official interpretations of the treaty which are entitled to binding weight in American courts and legislatures. This effectively transfers ultimate policy authority for all policies in this area to this foreign committee. (8)
Under international law, the treaty overrides even our Constitution. (9)
Reservations, declarations, or understandings intended to modify our duty to comply with this treaty will be void if they are determined to be inconsistent with the object and purpose of the treaty. (10)
Ten things you need to know about the substance of the CRC:
Parents would no longer be able to administer reasonable spankings to their children.(11)
A murderer aged 17 years and 11 months and 29 days at the time of his crime could no longer be sentenced to life in prison.(12)
Children would have the ability to choose their own religion while parents would only have the authority to give their children advice about religion. (13)
The best interest of the child principle would give the government the ability to override every decision made by every parent if a government worker disagreed with the parent’s decision. (14)
A child’s “right to be heard” would allow them to seek governmental review of every parental decision with which the child disagreed. (15)
This treaty has been interpreted to make it illegal for a nation to spend more on national defense than it does on children’s welfare. (16)
Children would acquire a legally enforceable right to leisure. (17)
Teaching children about Christianity in schools has been held to be out of compliance with the CRC. (18)
Allowing parents to opt their children out of sex education has been held to be out of compliance with the CRC. (19)
Children would have the right to reproductive health information and services without parental knowledge or consent. (20)
REFERENCES:
1 Page 3, paragraph 1 of this document and pages 17–19.
2 Pages 4–5 of this document, and pages 17–19.
3 Page 5, paragraph 4 of this document, and footnote 22.
4 Pages 17–19 of this document.
5 Page 21, paragraphs 1–2 of this document.
6 Pages 8–9 of this document.
7 Page 5 of this document.
8 Page 9 of this document.
9 Page 4 of this document.
10 Pages 19–20 of this document.
11 Page 5, paragraphs 4–5 of this document.
12 Page 15, paragraph 1 of this document.
13 Page 27, paragraph 4 of this document.
14 Pages 10–12 of this document.
15 Page 26 of this document.
16 Page 9, paragraph 2 of this document.
17 Page 15, paragraph 1 of this document.
18 The American Bar Association, which supports the CRC, said that a Christian school’s refusal to teach “alternate worldviews” would “fly in the face of article 29” of the treaty. Children’s Rights in America: U.N. Convention on the Rights of the Child Compared with United States Law, Cynthia Price Cohen and Howard Davidson, ed., (1990) p. 182. Ms. Cohen was a member of the Ad Hoc NGO Group on the Drafting of the Convention on the Rights of the Child. Mr. Davidson is the Director of the American Bar Association’s Center on Children and the Law. The book was published by the ABA in 1990 and is available from that organization. It is cited throughout as (ABA).
19 Pages 12–14 of this document.
20 Supra, and pages 26–27.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Sixteen Months of Amazement
Sixteen months ago my eyes locked with two of the brownest little eyes I have ever seen. Lil Man was born and so was a Grammy - all on that special day. I can vividly recall all the "firsts" we have shared with him - his first diaper, first photo, first bath, first car ride, and first day he stayed with me. Sixteen months of amazement have come and gone. A little life is growing faster than we ever imagined (or hoped).
No one ever told me what a delight being a Grandmother would be. My grandmother-friends would share stories and photos, however, I never dreamed what a special day it would be when I joined that elite club (Grandmas Rule).
Lil Man's last month has been filled with many special events - visiting Santa, going to church with Grammy on Christmas Eve, opening gifts on Christmas morning, his vacation to Nashville, making snowballs and baking cookies on a cold Sunday night, and one other amazing feat that I am about to announce!
It all began when Lil Man's Mommy placed a new Elmo Potty Chair in the bathroom. No one really anticipated that he would show much interest in the colorful chair in the corner. But preparations were in place should the urge to abandon ship on the diapers ever appear. Boy, did Lil Man ever surprise us. Within minutes, he was signaling to his Mommy, CEO of all things potty-related, that he knew what to do and how to do it! No training required for this Lil Man. I had three daughters and never saw any of them take off with potty training like this and I always had heard boys were more of a challenge to potty train.
Onward to our seventeenth month with the world's greatest little boy! Who can imagine what he might be doing for me to report next month? Reading? Driving the car? Mastering a second language? That is a wonderful aspect about being a Grammy - I can ramble and rant and rave about this little person and everyone just tolerates it and says, "Just go along with her comments, she must be a grandmother!"
No one ever told me what a delight being a Grandmother would be. My grandmother-friends would share stories and photos, however, I never dreamed what a special day it would be when I joined that elite club (Grandmas Rule).
Lil Man's last month has been filled with many special events - visiting Santa, going to church with Grammy on Christmas Eve, opening gifts on Christmas morning, his vacation to Nashville, making snowballs and baking cookies on a cold Sunday night, and one other amazing feat that I am about to announce!
It all began when Lil Man's Mommy placed a new Elmo Potty Chair in the bathroom. No one really anticipated that he would show much interest in the colorful chair in the corner. But preparations were in place should the urge to abandon ship on the diapers ever appear. Boy, did Lil Man ever surprise us. Within minutes, he was signaling to his Mommy, CEO of all things potty-related, that he knew what to do and how to do it! No training required for this Lil Man. I had three daughters and never saw any of them take off with potty training like this and I always had heard boys were more of a challenge to potty train.
Onward to our seventeenth month with the world's greatest little boy! Who can imagine what he might be doing for me to report next month? Reading? Driving the car? Mastering a second language? That is a wonderful aspect about being a Grammy - I can ramble and rant and rave about this little person and everyone just tolerates it and says, "Just go along with her comments, she must be a grandmother!"
He Is
Lyrics by Mark Schultz
Father, let the world just fade away
Let me feel your presence in this place
Lord, I’ve never been so weary
How I need to know you’re near me
Father, let the world just fade away
Till I’m on my knees
Till my heart can sing
He is
He was
He always will be
Even when it feels like there is no one holding me
Be still, my soul
He is
Father, let your Holy Spirit sing
Let it calm the storm inside of me
As I stand amazed
Lift my hands and say
He is
He was
He always will be
He lives
He loves
He’s always with me
Even when it feels like there is no one holding me
Be still, my soul
Through every fear
And every doubt
And every tear I shed
Down every road
I’m not alone
No matter where I am
He is
He was
And He always will be
He lives
He loves
He’s always with me
Even when it feels like there is no one holding me
Be still, my soul
Be still, and know
Be still, my soul
He is
Father, let the world just fade away
Let me feel your presence in this place
Lord, I’ve never been so weary
How I need to know you’re near me
Father, let the world just fade away
Till I’m on my knees
Till my heart can sing
He is
He was
He always will be
Even when it feels like there is no one holding me
Be still, my soul
He is
Father, let your Holy Spirit sing
Let it calm the storm inside of me
As I stand amazed
Lift my hands and say
He is
He was
He always will be
He lives
He loves
He’s always with me
Even when it feels like there is no one holding me
Be still, my soul
Through every fear
And every doubt
And every tear I shed
Down every road
I’m not alone
No matter where I am
He is
He was
And He always will be
He lives
He loves
He’s always with me
Even when it feels like there is no one holding me
Be still, my soul
Be still, and know
Be still, my soul
He is
The Joy of Obedience
A friend sent me this devotion written by Charles Stanley. Its message is vital to our having blessed lives with the promise of eternal life. Disobedience to God may feel right or good for a moment, but there will always, always be consequences. The sooner we master this principle, the sooner we will reap God's blessings and joy in our lives.
Consider this story. Before leaving for work one morning, a father says to his son, "Straighten your room, take out the garbage, and sweep the driveway." When Dad comes home, the son explains his approach to the chore list: "Well, Dad, the garbage can was only half full. And, I figured nobody would see my room. But I cleaned the driveway, just as you said."
How many of us treat God the same way? We approach Him with rationalizations and arguments instead of submission.
Many people associate obedience with raising children—particularly when they see one misbehaving. Submission to God’s will, however, is important at every stage of a believer’s maturity. As our faith grows, obedience becomes a cornerstone of fellowship with our Father. Through it, He teaches us more about His love and precepts while drawing us closer to Himself.
Oddly, physical maturity can diminish our obedience. An adult believer may tell himself that he has learned to live righteously and therefore no longer needs to make a concentrated effort. In a short time, he will find himself far off the path God intended, wandering around with a pile of rags he thinks are righteous acts (Isa. 64:6). Disobedience says to the Lord, “I know better than You how to govern my life.”
Nothing could be further from the truth. We might think our rationalizations sound convincing, but God isn't fooled. He requires complete obedience. When we decide to follow only portions of His will, we choose rebellion. Anytime we step outside God's will for our lives, we can expect consequences for not following the right path.
Scripture and church members are full of stories to prove that obedient submission is the only way to experience deep, lasting joy. Nothing good can come from rebelling against the Lord, and nothing bad can come from obeying Him—even physical death for the sake of following the Lord is better than denying His will.
Obedience is the pathway to wisdom and blessing. When we conform our will to God’s, we place our hope and trust in the One who created us and loves us without condition.
A life well lived is one in which our eyes are focused upon the Lord, our ears are open to the quiet voice of the Holy Spirit, and our hearts feast on Scripture. When we choose this existence, we guarantee ourselves the finest that God has to offer.
There is no second best for the obedient child of the Father.
Consider this story. Before leaving for work one morning, a father says to his son, "Straighten your room, take out the garbage, and sweep the driveway." When Dad comes home, the son explains his approach to the chore list: "Well, Dad, the garbage can was only half full. And, I figured nobody would see my room. But I cleaned the driveway, just as you said."
How many of us treat God the same way? We approach Him with rationalizations and arguments instead of submission.
Many people associate obedience with raising children—particularly when they see one misbehaving. Submission to God’s will, however, is important at every stage of a believer’s maturity. As our faith grows, obedience becomes a cornerstone of fellowship with our Father. Through it, He teaches us more about His love and precepts while drawing us closer to Himself.
Oddly, physical maturity can diminish our obedience. An adult believer may tell himself that he has learned to live righteously and therefore no longer needs to make a concentrated effort. In a short time, he will find himself far off the path God intended, wandering around with a pile of rags he thinks are righteous acts (Isa. 64:6). Disobedience says to the Lord, “I know better than You how to govern my life.”
Nothing could be further from the truth. We might think our rationalizations sound convincing, but God isn't fooled. He requires complete obedience. When we decide to follow only portions of His will, we choose rebellion. Anytime we step outside God's will for our lives, we can expect consequences for not following the right path.
Scripture and church members are full of stories to prove that obedient submission is the only way to experience deep, lasting joy. Nothing good can come from rebelling against the Lord, and nothing bad can come from obeying Him—even physical death for the sake of following the Lord is better than denying His will.
Obedience is the pathway to wisdom and blessing. When we conform our will to God’s, we place our hope and trust in the One who created us and loves us without condition.
A life well lived is one in which our eyes are focused upon the Lord, our ears are open to the quiet voice of the Holy Spirit, and our hearts feast on Scripture. When we choose this existence, we guarantee ourselves the finest that God has to offer.
There is no second best for the obedient child of the Father.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Faith Challenge
",,,,,In the presence of Him whom he believed—God, who gives life to the dead and calls those things which do not exist as though they did; who, contrary to hope, in hope believed, so that he became the father of many nations, according to what was spoken, “So shall your descendants be.” And not being weak in faith, he did not consider his own body, already dead (since he was about a hundred years old), and the deadness of Sarah’s womb. He did not waver at the promise of God through unbelief, but was strengthened in faith, giving glory to God, and being fully convinced that what He had promised He was also able to perform." (Romans 4:17-21)
Power explodes from these Words. When I read and meditate on certain passages of Scripture, instantly my mind and spirit realize how intensely life changing they can be for me. And this is one of those passages of Scriptures. Abraham's acts of faith are numerous and impressive. I long for that degree of faith in my own life. Here, he is an old, old man and his wife, Sarah, is an old, old woman and they are trusting God for Sarah to become pregnant to bear Abraham a son. To me, that is faith deserving to be replicated by us. Several points in this passage are worth our attention.
It is established that Abraham "believed God". If we are lacking in this basic spiritual foundation, we have nothing but shaking sand to build our lives upon. I want the bedrock of faith in God that guarantees, no matter what I have to face in this life, I will not be shaken to despondency and hopelessness.
God's ways are never our ways. This passage reminds us: "God, who gives life to the dead and calls those things which do not exist as though they did". I cling to these words - God IS the giver of life (even to the dead). Life is a priceless commodity, especially for end stage cancer patients. Too many times to enumerate, my Lord has reached down and rescued me from the brink of death. He does give life! Praises be to His Name! And, since we are wise to follow God's example, what do these verses tell us? That God "calls those things which do not exist as though they did". Midway through this leukemia battle, I began to study a great deal on the importance in the spiritual realm of the words we utter with our mouths. Of the life-changing studies I have done, this one has proven to be vital to my lengthy survival, despite overwhelming odds. From hospital beds, I have uttered these words over and over as death loomed at the door: "For by Me your days will be multiplied and years added unto your life" (Proverbs 9:11). "Give attention to My Words; incline your ear to my sayings. Do not let them depart from your eyes for they are LIFE to those who find them and HEALTH to all their flesh." (Proverbs 4:20). I don't meditate on these words as a futile exercise - I am obeying God's example to "call those things which do not exist as though they do". His Word has not failed me.
We are told about Abraham, "And not being weak in faith, he did not consider his own body, already dead..." Although 100 years old, Abraham's faith did not waiver in his belief that God would bless him with a son born of Sarah. He did not look at his aged body. He believed. He trusted God. Circumstances did not inflict doubt on his prayer. This is a tough assignment. How many of us can have a life-threatening diagnosis tossed our direction and not waiver or flinch? Yet, this is precisely the instructions God has given to us through His Holy Word. Circumstances and situations must never cloud our spiritual vision. We must not doubt God due to the difficulties that approach our lives.
Abraham's actions are memorialized in these God-breathed words: "He did not waiver at the promise of God through unbelief, but was strengthened in faith, giving glory to God, and being fully convinced that what He had promised He was also able to perform." We need to take heed and listen and word by word, ingest this passage of Scripture. We need to memorize it. We need to imitate Abraham - he did not waiver; he did not allow unbelief to interfere; difficult times only strengthened his faith; he continued to praise and give glory to His Father; and he was" fully convinced" that God was going to do what He promised to do.
In my humble opinion, if Christians will make a concerted effort to obey the example that Abraham has left for us in these Holy Words, our lives will be changed immensely. Problems and life situations when faced with the power and example of God's Word are eradicated and Satan is placed promptly in the corner. Impossible situations suddenly appear possible when anointed with the faith of a believer, touched by the power of All Mighty God. God is unchanging - His Word tells us this fact. If He orchestrated a birth for an aged couple who believed, He will perform no less impressive miracles for those of us who love and serve Him.
Let us not be weak in our faith.
Power explodes from these Words. When I read and meditate on certain passages of Scripture, instantly my mind and spirit realize how intensely life changing they can be for me. And this is one of those passages of Scriptures. Abraham's acts of faith are numerous and impressive. I long for that degree of faith in my own life. Here, he is an old, old man and his wife, Sarah, is an old, old woman and they are trusting God for Sarah to become pregnant to bear Abraham a son. To me, that is faith deserving to be replicated by us. Several points in this passage are worth our attention.
It is established that Abraham "believed God". If we are lacking in this basic spiritual foundation, we have nothing but shaking sand to build our lives upon. I want the bedrock of faith in God that guarantees, no matter what I have to face in this life, I will not be shaken to despondency and hopelessness.
God's ways are never our ways. This passage reminds us: "God, who gives life to the dead and calls those things which do not exist as though they did". I cling to these words - God IS the giver of life (even to the dead). Life is a priceless commodity, especially for end stage cancer patients. Too many times to enumerate, my Lord has reached down and rescued me from the brink of death. He does give life! Praises be to His Name! And, since we are wise to follow God's example, what do these verses tell us? That God "calls those things which do not exist as though they did". Midway through this leukemia battle, I began to study a great deal on the importance in the spiritual realm of the words we utter with our mouths. Of the life-changing studies I have done, this one has proven to be vital to my lengthy survival, despite overwhelming odds. From hospital beds, I have uttered these words over and over as death loomed at the door: "For by Me your days will be multiplied and years added unto your life" (Proverbs 9:11). "Give attention to My Words; incline your ear to my sayings. Do not let them depart from your eyes for they are LIFE to those who find them and HEALTH to all their flesh." (Proverbs 4:20). I don't meditate on these words as a futile exercise - I am obeying God's example to "call those things which do not exist as though they do". His Word has not failed me.
We are told about Abraham, "And not being weak in faith, he did not consider his own body, already dead..." Although 100 years old, Abraham's faith did not waiver in his belief that God would bless him with a son born of Sarah. He did not look at his aged body. He believed. He trusted God. Circumstances did not inflict doubt on his prayer. This is a tough assignment. How many of us can have a life-threatening diagnosis tossed our direction and not waiver or flinch? Yet, this is precisely the instructions God has given to us through His Holy Word. Circumstances and situations must never cloud our spiritual vision. We must not doubt God due to the difficulties that approach our lives.
Abraham's actions are memorialized in these God-breathed words: "He did not waiver at the promise of God through unbelief, but was strengthened in faith, giving glory to God, and being fully convinced that what He had promised He was also able to perform." We need to take heed and listen and word by word, ingest this passage of Scripture. We need to memorize it. We need to imitate Abraham - he did not waiver; he did not allow unbelief to interfere; difficult times only strengthened his faith; he continued to praise and give glory to His Father; and he was" fully convinced" that God was going to do what He promised to do.
In my humble opinion, if Christians will make a concerted effort to obey the example that Abraham has left for us in these Holy Words, our lives will be changed immensely. Problems and life situations when faced with the power and example of God's Word are eradicated and Satan is placed promptly in the corner. Impossible situations suddenly appear possible when anointed with the faith of a believer, touched by the power of All Mighty God. God is unchanging - His Word tells us this fact. If He orchestrated a birth for an aged couple who believed, He will perform no less impressive miracles for those of us who love and serve Him.
Let us not be weak in our faith.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly
You have probably heard the adage, "The Good, The Bad and The Ugly!" The terminology originated from an Italian western starring Clint Eastwood. The Italian pronunciation being "il buono, il brutto, il cattivo". And it referred to their search for gold in the midst of battles, prison camps and other downsides of the hunt for treasure.
Searching for cancer treatments could be prefaced with the same phrase. The Good. The Bad. The Ugly. I have yet to discover a cancer treatment that I have required that was not without significant side effects and risks. Thus, I place those risks on a balance scale and seek to determine if the benefits will truly outweigh the risks - otherwise known as the bad and ugly side of modern medicine.
For instance, IVIG is the treatment that I take every 28 days that supposedly offers "the good" benefit of supporting my damaged immune system. Monthly, I request pray and pray myself that the known risks of kidney damage or infections from blood-borne pathogens will not compromise my body. These "bad" side effects are serious yet, thus far, I have believed that the potential for protection from infections has outweighed these potential side effects.
Then yesterday, I uncovered a recently released medical journal article where "the ugly" side of IVIG becomes very obvious, very quickly. And it is a very ugly discovery that I am now going to have to reevaluate against the potential for the IVIG to benefit me. This article details how a patient with the same leukemia that I have was given IVIG and within hours, had a heart attack that was followed by a stroke. He died shortly thereafter. It is believed that these thromboembolic events (blood clot induced) were a result of the IVIG. The study also points out that patients with a history of past thromboembolic events (I have had a blood clot in my lung also known as a pulmonary embolus) are at higher risk for this complication.
When the natural side of my life reviews these bad and ugly risks of treatments that I supposedly need to survive, life can become very dark and frightening. My brain shuts down. My heart races. Confusion attempts to set in. I am certain, only by living a life where I rely upon the Holy Spirit, can I make these disturbing decisions based on my best interest. When I feel that unsteadiness in my spirit, I can rest assured that the Holy Spirit is attempting to bridle my own knowledge and opinions and "steer" them in the direction that only God Alone knows is best for me. This is part of the reason that I depend upon the prayers of so many believers. I have to make too many life or death decisions for myself each and every week to rely upon my own human instinct. I am grateful to God Almighty for his gift of the Holy Spirit!
I encourage you not to be perplexed or overwhelmed when people talk about the Holy Spirit. Acts 2:38 precisely explains to us: "Then Peter said to them, 'Repent, and let every one of you be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit'." And Luke 11:13 informs us: "If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him."
Carefully consider these Scriptures. We learn that the Holy Spirit is a gift that our Father bestows upon His children. Yet, Acts 2:38 teaches us that there are some prerequisites to receiving the gift of the Holy Spirit. We cannot live a life replete with sin and expect to ever hear the still, small voice of the Holy Spirit or sense His guiding our steps and decisions. We must repent of our sins and believe in Jesus as our Savior. Then the pathway to the power of the Holy Spirit is paved for us.
Searching for cancer treatments could be prefaced with the same phrase. The Good. The Bad. The Ugly. I have yet to discover a cancer treatment that I have required that was not without significant side effects and risks. Thus, I place those risks on a balance scale and seek to determine if the benefits will truly outweigh the risks - otherwise known as the bad and ugly side of modern medicine.
For instance, IVIG is the treatment that I take every 28 days that supposedly offers "the good" benefit of supporting my damaged immune system. Monthly, I request pray and pray myself that the known risks of kidney damage or infections from blood-borne pathogens will not compromise my body. These "bad" side effects are serious yet, thus far, I have believed that the potential for protection from infections has outweighed these potential side effects.
Then yesterday, I uncovered a recently released medical journal article where "the ugly" side of IVIG becomes very obvious, very quickly. And it is a very ugly discovery that I am now going to have to reevaluate against the potential for the IVIG to benefit me. This article details how a patient with the same leukemia that I have was given IVIG and within hours, had a heart attack that was followed by a stroke. He died shortly thereafter. It is believed that these thromboembolic events (blood clot induced) were a result of the IVIG. The study also points out that patients with a history of past thromboembolic events (I have had a blood clot in my lung also known as a pulmonary embolus) are at higher risk for this complication.
When the natural side of my life reviews these bad and ugly risks of treatments that I supposedly need to survive, life can become very dark and frightening. My brain shuts down. My heart races. Confusion attempts to set in. I am certain, only by living a life where I rely upon the Holy Spirit, can I make these disturbing decisions based on my best interest. When I feel that unsteadiness in my spirit, I can rest assured that the Holy Spirit is attempting to bridle my own knowledge and opinions and "steer" them in the direction that only God Alone knows is best for me. This is part of the reason that I depend upon the prayers of so many believers. I have to make too many life or death decisions for myself each and every week to rely upon my own human instinct. I am grateful to God Almighty for his gift of the Holy Spirit!
I encourage you not to be perplexed or overwhelmed when people talk about the Holy Spirit. Acts 2:38 precisely explains to us: "Then Peter said to them, 'Repent, and let every one of you be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit'." And Luke 11:13 informs us: "If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him."
Carefully consider these Scriptures. We learn that the Holy Spirit is a gift that our Father bestows upon His children. Yet, Acts 2:38 teaches us that there are some prerequisites to receiving the gift of the Holy Spirit. We cannot live a life replete with sin and expect to ever hear the still, small voice of the Holy Spirit or sense His guiding our steps and decisions. We must repent of our sins and believe in Jesus as our Savior. Then the pathway to the power of the Holy Spirit is paved for us.
An Update & Request for Prayer: January 7, 2010
A quick update - I had labs drawn early this morning (the drive to the doctor's office took 40 minutes versus 20 minutes due to the wind and snow). Several concerns emerged .....
-I am severely neutropenic (again). I am awaiting the arrival of the B3 that my doctor ordered for me to try to see if the chronic neutropenia can be reversed or improved. Neupogen injection again tonight. We don't like this indicator of a failing bone marrow. Please pray for this to reverse and for the insurance company to be generous and not stop payment on these frequent injections (cost is over $400 per injection).
-My lymphocyte percentage is back to 96 percent which is the highest it has been since my half-dose Rituxan in June-Sept 2009. My informed readers know that lymphocytes are what are cancerous in my case. Unless a major new drug breakthrough occurs, there are probably no further treatment that I can survive.
-My iron levels are almost non-existent in the blood. My last bone marrow biopsy showed that the iron stores there are absent. This is contributing to my low hemoglobin, shortness of breath, and fatigue. Insurance is refusing to cover the drug the doctors want me to take to assist with this.
-My thyroid levels indicate a substantial worsening of hypothyroidism. I need to do some research, I am not certain what would cause this worsening of this condition.
-Liver enzymes were elevated. I am suspicious that this is related to all of the medication I am taking. Leukemia can infiltrate the liver and I have a spot on CT that doctors have been monitoring on my liver but it has remained stable.
We are awaiting the NIH review of my MRI's on my spine and hips - I am still battling this bone pain.
Thank you for your continued prayers. We are under a winter storm warning due to high winds, frigid temperatures and blowing and drifting snow - please pray for safe travel as our daughters all have substantial commutes to their places of employment.
-I am severely neutropenic (again). I am awaiting the arrival of the B3 that my doctor ordered for me to try to see if the chronic neutropenia can be reversed or improved. Neupogen injection again tonight. We don't like this indicator of a failing bone marrow. Please pray for this to reverse and for the insurance company to be generous and not stop payment on these frequent injections (cost is over $400 per injection).
-My lymphocyte percentage is back to 96 percent which is the highest it has been since my half-dose Rituxan in June-Sept 2009. My informed readers know that lymphocytes are what are cancerous in my case. Unless a major new drug breakthrough occurs, there are probably no further treatment that I can survive.
-My iron levels are almost non-existent in the blood. My last bone marrow biopsy showed that the iron stores there are absent. This is contributing to my low hemoglobin, shortness of breath, and fatigue. Insurance is refusing to cover the drug the doctors want me to take to assist with this.
-My thyroid levels indicate a substantial worsening of hypothyroidism. I need to do some research, I am not certain what would cause this worsening of this condition.
-Liver enzymes were elevated. I am suspicious that this is related to all of the medication I am taking. Leukemia can infiltrate the liver and I have a spot on CT that doctors have been monitoring on my liver but it has remained stable.
We are awaiting the NIH review of my MRI's on my spine and hips - I am still battling this bone pain.
Thank you for your continued prayers. We are under a winter storm warning due to high winds, frigid temperatures and blowing and drifting snow - please pray for safe travel as our daughters all have substantial commutes to their places of employment.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
364 Other Days of Christmas
The celebrations and chaos of the Christmas holiday have passed. Gifts, parties, cards, carols, trees, decorations, and tidings of comfort and joy have come and gone. Jesus has fought and attempted to squirm His way into each celebration - disappointed that His day is now referred to as a Holi-day and not Christ-mas. He must weep as government officials vote to remove the nativity scenes and Christmas trees from city halls and other public buildings. Greeting cards declare HAPPY HOLIDAYS or SEASON'S GREETINGS. The one and only day that Christmas is celebrated is being watered down and downplayed by a secular society, bent on being politically correct.
As a Christian, I had a revelation this past weekend. The company had left. The decorations were being packed and returned to their storage home for the next 11 months. The gifts were unwrapped and being utilized. The hubbub of Christmas, the holiday, had drawn to another finale. And in the midst of the final motions of celebrating Christmas were concluding, I sensed the Holy Spirit guiding my heart to a new revelation.
I am going to allow the world to impose December 25th on the calendar as "the" day we are to celebrate Christ's birth. And I am going to hope and pray for Christians to make a stand against judges and other God-less leaders who attempt to snatch Christ out of Christmas. Then I am going to begin my 364 day celebration of Christmas. Each day I am making a dedicated effort to thank God for sending his Son to this earth on that holiest of nights. It seems to me that such an event is worth celebrating every day, and not just on December 25th. I anticipate in my newly formatted plan to celebrate the birth of Christ each day is going to be life transforming for me. I want to study the details about His birth. I want to reflect and savor the emotions of young Mary as she carried and delivered the Christ Child. I long to have the quiet outside of December's hectiness, to focus on the true meaning of Christ and His arrival on earth. I yearn to celebrate His birth without the distractions that the December 25th celebration impose.
As I enter into my daily celebration of Christ's birth, I will give the gift of prayer to those I love. I have never been so impressed as to pray for the lives and souls of my loved ones in 2010. Instead of a push to address and drop Christmas cards in the mailbox for a December delivery, I am going to attempt to encourage others with sending weekly cards to those who are hurting or lonely. I have just begun to orchestrate all that I will do during my year long Christmas celebration. I do know that the simple decision to purposefully focus on Christ's birth and all that Jesus represents to each of us, will be life-altering for any of us who take time to be in His presence.
Would you like to join me on my 364 day Christmas Celebration?
Isaiah 9:6:
For unto us a Child is born,
Unto us a Son is given;
And the government will be upon His shoulder.
And His name will be called
Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
As a Christian, I had a revelation this past weekend. The company had left. The decorations were being packed and returned to their storage home for the next 11 months. The gifts were unwrapped and being utilized. The hubbub of Christmas, the holiday, had drawn to another finale. And in the midst of the final motions of celebrating Christmas were concluding, I sensed the Holy Spirit guiding my heart to a new revelation.
I am going to allow the world to impose December 25th on the calendar as "the" day we are to celebrate Christ's birth. And I am going to hope and pray for Christians to make a stand against judges and other God-less leaders who attempt to snatch Christ out of Christmas. Then I am going to begin my 364 day celebration of Christmas. Each day I am making a dedicated effort to thank God for sending his Son to this earth on that holiest of nights. It seems to me that such an event is worth celebrating every day, and not just on December 25th. I anticipate in my newly formatted plan to celebrate the birth of Christ each day is going to be life transforming for me. I want to study the details about His birth. I want to reflect and savor the emotions of young Mary as she carried and delivered the Christ Child. I long to have the quiet outside of December's hectiness, to focus on the true meaning of Christ and His arrival on earth. I yearn to celebrate His birth without the distractions that the December 25th celebration impose.
As I enter into my daily celebration of Christ's birth, I will give the gift of prayer to those I love. I have never been so impressed as to pray for the lives and souls of my loved ones in 2010. Instead of a push to address and drop Christmas cards in the mailbox for a December delivery, I am going to attempt to encourage others with sending weekly cards to those who are hurting or lonely. I have just begun to orchestrate all that I will do during my year long Christmas celebration. I do know that the simple decision to purposefully focus on Christ's birth and all that Jesus represents to each of us, will be life-altering for any of us who take time to be in His presence.
Would you like to join me on my 364 day Christmas Celebration?
Isaiah 9:6:
For unto us a Child is born,
Unto us a Son is given;
And the government will be upon His shoulder.
And His name will be called
Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
My Prayer for 2010
Recently I have listened to the John Waller song, While I'm Waiting. And each time I listen to this song, I realize that the lyrics are the cry from my heart for this time and season of my life. I have been waiting. I am waiting. I will continue to wait for my body to be healed and restored. Some might question why this leukemia battle has been ongoing for over 13 years despite our prayers and pleas to God. Yet, I know with certainty, that I have been blessed and healed many times over - my body continues to defy the "predictions" of the brightest medical minds. Remember, God's ways are not our ways! Prayers have been answered and continue to be answered. Please, do not cease praying.
These lyrics are going to be my prayer for 2010.
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait
I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting I will serve You
While I'm waiting I will worship
While I'm waiting I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord
LINK TO THE MUSIC VIDEO:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2xTTlagVq0Y
These lyrics are going to be my prayer for 2010.
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait
I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting I will serve You
While I'm waiting I will worship
While I'm waiting I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord
LINK TO THE MUSIC VIDEO:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2xTTlagVq0Y
Sunday, January 3, 2010
ICE!
We took our grandson to experience the ICE! show while in Nashville.
Over thirty Chinese ice carvers were brought to sculpt the scenes from
A Charlie Brown Christmas
with 2 million pounds of ice.
The ice was colored
and everything you view in these photographs is colored ice.
It was a chilling (9 degree), extraordinary experience for all of us.
Gaylord Opryland Resort
These photographs are from the Gaylord Opryland Resort. It is a beautiful place to visit and at Christmas,
the nine acre hotel comes alive with life-sized nativities and lights
too beautiful to describe.
I will allow my photographs to illustrate .......
Wish You Were Here
When I hear this Mark Harris song, I always sense that the lyrics are ones that I would want to sing back to my loved ones, once I am residing in Heaven. Or if I could pen a letter on Heavenly stationery and send it back to earth on wings and a prayer, this is what I would write or sing to those I love the very most, as a reminder that I live on - forever - in Heaven.
Take a listen and consider that Heaven is a place none of us should ever want to risk missing .......
I wanted to tell you how closely
I've kept the memories of you in my heart
And all of the lifetimes that we had to share
Live even though we're apart but don't cry for me
'Cause I'm finally free
To run with the angels
On streets made of gold
To listen to stories of saints new and old
To worship our Maker
That's where I'll be
When you finally find me
No don't you be weary cause waiting for you
Are wonders that you've never known
Just hold on to Jesus, reach out for his hands
And one day
They'll welcome you home
And that's when you'll be
Finally free, finally free
I wish you were here, I wish you were here
And all of the dreams that you treasure
Will soon come together
And that's when your sorrow will find tomorrow
And you will rise again
We'll run with the angels on streets made of gold
We'll listen to stories of saints new and old
We'll worship our maker that's where we'll be
When you finally find me I wish you were here
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEk4e75l26I
Take a listen and consider that Heaven is a place none of us should ever want to risk missing .......
I wanted to tell you how closely
I've kept the memories of you in my heart
And all of the lifetimes that we had to share
Live even though we're apart but don't cry for me
'Cause I'm finally free
To run with the angels
On streets made of gold
To listen to stories of saints new and old
To worship our Maker
That's where I'll be
When you finally find me
No don't you be weary cause waiting for you
Are wonders that you've never known
Just hold on to Jesus, reach out for his hands
And one day
They'll welcome you home
And that's when you'll be
Finally free, finally free
I wish you were here, I wish you were here
And all of the dreams that you treasure
Will soon come together
And that's when your sorrow will find tomorrow
And you will rise again
We'll run with the angels on streets made of gold
We'll listen to stories of saints new and old
We'll worship our maker that's where we'll be
When you finally find me I wish you were here
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEk4e75l26I
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Breaths
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away .....
Young bride in white, walking toward my husband at the altar ……
Instantly knowing that new life was growing inside of my body (times three) ........
Locking my eyes with the eyes of each of our three daughters for the first time .......
Holding my grandson to my chest and kissing his head for the first time ........
Clutching and reflecting on a life of love from my parents …....
Walking out of a hospital from Intensive Care Units and breathing in fresh air as I recognized God's faithfulness from delivering me once again (grass never looks so green or the sky so blue as when I emerge from a hospital stay) ……
Glimpsing each of our daughters in their wedding gowns for the first time …..
Swallowing with pride and gratefulness as I watched each of our daughters receive their college diplomas ……
Ocean waves bounding toward me with the mighty roar of God’s power…..
Mountain heights touching the Heavenlies ......
Niagara Falls’ thundering power and presence ……
Beauty and serenity of walking in a snowstorm
…… the hush that the blanket of new-fallen snow emits.
The moments that have taken my breath away …….
Young bride in white, walking toward my husband at the altar ……
Instantly knowing that new life was growing inside of my body (times three) ........
Locking my eyes with the eyes of each of our three daughters for the first time .......
Holding my grandson to my chest and kissing his head for the first time ........
Clutching and reflecting on a life of love from my parents …....
Walking out of a hospital from Intensive Care Units and breathing in fresh air as I recognized God's faithfulness from delivering me once again (grass never looks so green or the sky so blue as when I emerge from a hospital stay) ……
Glimpsing each of our daughters in their wedding gowns for the first time …..
Swallowing with pride and gratefulness as I watched each of our daughters receive their college diplomas ……
Ocean waves bounding toward me with the mighty roar of God’s power…..
Mountain heights touching the Heavenlies ......
Niagara Falls’ thundering power and presence ……
Beauty and serenity of walking in a snowstorm
…… the hush that the blanket of new-fallen snow emits.
The moments that have taken my breath away …….
I'm Weary
When I contemplate adjectives that best describe my life as I step into another year with leukemia as my cohort, “weary” comes to mind. Weary is defined as “tired; run out of strength, patience or endurance; and exhausted”. Do those words ever illustrate my life right now!
My physical body is tired of over thirteen years with tests and needles, medicines and pain. I long for a day that is free of pain. My mind is tired of researching treatment options and late-breaking research on leukemia. I am tired. Very, very tired.
I am certain that God has compassion on me when He looks from the Heavenlies and sees my weary mind, body and soul. In Matthew 9, when he saw the multitudes, we are told, “…He was moved with compassion for them, because they were weary …..” That offers me some comfort and solace. He knows. He sees. He understands.
And while the knowledge that God is aware of my weariness is comforting, I know deep in my heart, that I must continue to battle weariness lest it overwhelm and hijack my life. Galatians 6:9 reminds me: “Let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.” The reality being that when we are weary and running out of the oomph that life demands, we benefit by focusing on doing good for others. It distracts us from our own pain and suffering. And if we do not “lose heart”, we are going to be blessed for our efforts to look after the needs of others.
I believe this is part of the reason that Lil Man has been such a blessing to me. It would be far easier to lay in bed everyday with the pain and exhaustion my body battles each day. Nevertheless, by pulling myself up and chasing after my precious grandson, I am blessed. He is blessed to be watched by family who dearly love him while his Mommy is at work. I am blessed by the distractions he provides for me against pain and leukemia. I must continue to battle this weariness. I do not want it to overcome my life and purpose. I must not lose heart. Lil Man is counting on his Grammy!
My physical body is tired of over thirteen years with tests and needles, medicines and pain. I long for a day that is free of pain. My mind is tired of researching treatment options and late-breaking research on leukemia. I am tired. Very, very tired.
I am certain that God has compassion on me when He looks from the Heavenlies and sees my weary mind, body and soul. In Matthew 9, when he saw the multitudes, we are told, “…He was moved with compassion for them, because they were weary …..” That offers me some comfort and solace. He knows. He sees. He understands.
And while the knowledge that God is aware of my weariness is comforting, I know deep in my heart, that I must continue to battle weariness lest it overwhelm and hijack my life. Galatians 6:9 reminds me: “Let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.” The reality being that when we are weary and running out of the oomph that life demands, we benefit by focusing on doing good for others. It distracts us from our own pain and suffering. And if we do not “lose heart”, we are going to be blessed for our efforts to look after the needs of others.
I believe this is part of the reason that Lil Man has been such a blessing to me. It would be far easier to lay in bed everyday with the pain and exhaustion my body battles each day. Nevertheless, by pulling myself up and chasing after my precious grandson, I am blessed. He is blessed to be watched by family who dearly love him while his Mommy is at work. I am blessed by the distractions he provides for me against pain and leukemia. I must continue to battle this weariness. I do not want it to overcome my life and purpose. I must not lose heart. Lil Man is counting on his Grammy!
Monday, December 28, 2009
One Month Left
Have you ever reflected on what you would do and how you would live if you were told that you had one month to live? If like most people, you have never pondered such concerns. "The end" seems very remote to most souls and their focus remains on living life as though there will be thousands of tomorrows.
A diagnosis of leukemia at age 33 changed my life and immediately, I began living my life as though my days had been numbered and were quickly fading away. I can tell you with authority, being told that your life is finite, and perhaps, quickly finite, will change one's heart and soul. Foremost, I knew that I wanted my life to be pleasing to the Lord. I had professed Him as my Savior for many years, perhaps with a level of mediocrity. With the cancer diagnosis, I knew that each day, I wanted to remain repentant and to keep my heart and soul pleasing to Him. Not knowing the exact moment of our deaths (or the return of Christ at the Rapture) should make each of us aware of that moment when we will meet our Savior face to face to give an account of our lives. And for those who have shunned and denied Jesus as the Lord of their lives, reflecting on the possibility that they have been wrong about eternal life requiring the forgiveness of a Savior
With one month to live, I (and most of my readers) would most likely live those thirty or thirty-one days quite differently than the status quo of our current methods of living life. Let us complete an exercise in visualizing our past week - reflect on decisions we have made; places we have visited; words we have uttered; sins we have committed; or how we have spent each of the 1440 minutes in our days. If we absolutely, positively knew that our last thirty days of our life calendars were ticking away, what would have changed about the way we thought, spoke, or acted in the past month? These are important facts to ponder and contemplate. Let us take a few moments before we close our eyes tonight to consider the ramifications of how we are utilizing each moment of our lives .
Let us review the 139th Psalm.
1 O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.
5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,"
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake,
I am still with you.
19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God!
Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!
20 They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.
21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD,
and abhor those who rise up against you?
22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Whenever I read this Psalm, I marvel at the depth of intimacy God the Father has with His children. He has known us since the moment of our conception - all of our days were ordained by Him before the first day of our lives arrived. He knows our thoughts, the words about to slide off of our tongues, our going out and coming in, He knows it all. He sees it all. If we are foolish enough to think we can continue living lives of sinful speech, actions, thoughts or deeds that He does not know about, we are lying to ourselves. God loves each of us so much. He longs for our hearts to be dedicated to Him and His Word.
I write these words and share these life stories of mine with the sole intention that God will anoint and breathe on my mortal words so that they will awaken the hearts and souls of men and women around the world. That these mere words, when touched by the Holy Spirit, will burn in the hearts of those who read them and make each one realize that today could be the last day for any of us. Envision our last moments ticking off the eternal clock God has set for each of us and our lives being as filthy rags.
Isaiah 64:5-6
You are indeed angry, for we have sinned—
In these ways we continue;
And we need to be saved.
But we are all like an unclean thing,
And all our righteousnesses are like filthy rags;
Forgive us, today, Father, for our sins. Make our lives, filthy indeed, to be cleaned and redeemed by the blood of precious Jesus. Empower and equip each of us to live today as though it is our last day before we meet you, face to face. In Jesus' Name I pray. AMEN.
A diagnosis of leukemia at age 33 changed my life and immediately, I began living my life as though my days had been numbered and were quickly fading away. I can tell you with authority, being told that your life is finite, and perhaps, quickly finite, will change one's heart and soul. Foremost, I knew that I wanted my life to be pleasing to the Lord. I had professed Him as my Savior for many years, perhaps with a level of mediocrity. With the cancer diagnosis, I knew that each day, I wanted to remain repentant and to keep my heart and soul pleasing to Him. Not knowing the exact moment of our deaths (or the return of Christ at the Rapture) should make each of us aware of that moment when we will meet our Savior face to face to give an account of our lives. And for those who have shunned and denied Jesus as the Lord of their lives, reflecting on the possibility that they have been wrong about eternal life requiring the forgiveness of a Savior
With one month to live, I (and most of my readers) would most likely live those thirty or thirty-one days quite differently than the status quo of our current methods of living life. Let us complete an exercise in visualizing our past week - reflect on decisions we have made; places we have visited; words we have uttered; sins we have committed; or how we have spent each of the 1440 minutes in our days. If we absolutely, positively knew that our last thirty days of our life calendars were ticking away, what would have changed about the way we thought, spoke, or acted in the past month? These are important facts to ponder and contemplate. Let us take a few moments before we close our eyes tonight to consider the ramifications of how we are utilizing each moment of our lives .
Let us review the 139th Psalm.
1 O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.
5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,"
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake,
I am still with you.
19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God!
Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!
20 They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.
21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD,
and abhor those who rise up against you?
22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Whenever I read this Psalm, I marvel at the depth of intimacy God the Father has with His children. He has known us since the moment of our conception - all of our days were ordained by Him before the first day of our lives arrived. He knows our thoughts, the words about to slide off of our tongues, our going out and coming in, He knows it all. He sees it all. If we are foolish enough to think we can continue living lives of sinful speech, actions, thoughts or deeds that He does not know about, we are lying to ourselves. God loves each of us so much. He longs for our hearts to be dedicated to Him and His Word.
I write these words and share these life stories of mine with the sole intention that God will anoint and breathe on my mortal words so that they will awaken the hearts and souls of men and women around the world. That these mere words, when touched by the Holy Spirit, will burn in the hearts of those who read them and make each one realize that today could be the last day for any of us. Envision our last moments ticking off the eternal clock God has set for each of us and our lives being as filthy rags.
Isaiah 64:5-6
You are indeed angry, for we have sinned—
In these ways we continue;
And we need to be saved.
But we are all like an unclean thing,
And all our righteousnesses are like filthy rags;
Forgive us, today, Father, for our sins. Make our lives, filthy indeed, to be cleaned and redeemed by the blood of precious Jesus. Empower and equip each of us to live today as though it is our last day before we meet you, face to face. In Jesus' Name I pray. AMEN.
Cotton Candy
Do you recall the pastel colored fluffs of cotton candy that we savored as children at the circus and carnivals? Last night's snow covered bushes and the Christmas lights beneath formed these colored fluffs of "snow candy".
Request for Prayer & Update: December 28, 2009
I haven't updated on my health as I have tried to ignore my nemesis leukemia during the celebrating of Christmas. The trees are down, the gifts are unwrapped, and leukemia is back, stomping its foot and rearing its ugly head, demanding my attention once again.
I had blood drawn today and I absolutely, utterly failed my test! If you know me well, you know that I do not take kindly to failing anything - I am a perfectionist and over-achiever! On today's CBC there were 10 categories of testing and all ten were abnormal. That would be a sort of perfection, wouldn't it? Perfectly horrible!
I am neutropenic again. I have spent the bulk of 2009 with prolonged, chronic neutropenia (low counts of neutrophils, a category of white cells that are vital for fighting infection, especially bacterial infections). It doesn't require a brain surgeon to know what this is representative of a failing bone marrow that is no longer functioning and sustaining my life without medical intervention, in the form of Neupogen injections. I can go about 4-5 days and then I require another injection. I know these injections are contributing to the other sources of the severe bone pain that I am experiencing. Another needle, another day.
I realized that I had not updated after the MRI's and x-rays before Christmas. The chest x-ray was clear for infection and leukemic infiltrates. That is a praise! I experienced a true Christmas miracle in that I was able to complete the MRI's. I am very claustrophobic and can allow doctors to prod my bone marrow with 12 inch needles without sedation, but a painless scan forces shivers down my spine.
I took my praise and worship CD and the technician was a Christian with an IPOD full of Christian music by my favorite artists. She played that for me and talked me through both MRI's - they took over an hour and I kept looking back over the top of my head and could see the ceiling tile grids - they formed a perfect cross over the top of me. I kept telling myself if Jesus could and would hang on a cross for me, surely I could survive the MRI, with His help. And I did!
There were no fractures in the hip structure (due to chronic steroid use). The signals in the marrow were altered and my NIH leukemia specialist suspects that this is caused by the marrow being so impacted by leukemia that the normal fat or hematopoietic (blood forming) cells are not producing normal marrow signals. The NIH is going to review these MRI films and reports to offer us more information.
The MRI on my lower back revealed complete loss of bone marrow signal intensity. If my bones are this impacted by the leukemia, no wonder I am in such pain. Three herniated discs are also contributing to my pain concerns. The radiologist did not feel the discs were such that steroid injections into the nerve roots would be beneficial for me, so that pain relief option is off the table.
Please pray for 2010 to bring me another year of life, no matter the battles I must face and fight. Please pray for God to be merciful and to hear our cries to protect me from life-threatening infections and bone marrow failure.
I had blood drawn today and I absolutely, utterly failed my test! If you know me well, you know that I do not take kindly to failing anything - I am a perfectionist and over-achiever! On today's CBC there were 10 categories of testing and all ten were abnormal. That would be a sort of perfection, wouldn't it? Perfectly horrible!
I am neutropenic again. I have spent the bulk of 2009 with prolonged, chronic neutropenia (low counts of neutrophils, a category of white cells that are vital for fighting infection, especially bacterial infections). It doesn't require a brain surgeon to know what this is representative of a failing bone marrow that is no longer functioning and sustaining my life without medical intervention, in the form of Neupogen injections. I can go about 4-5 days and then I require another injection. I know these injections are contributing to the other sources of the severe bone pain that I am experiencing. Another needle, another day.
I realized that I had not updated after the MRI's and x-rays before Christmas. The chest x-ray was clear for infection and leukemic infiltrates. That is a praise! I experienced a true Christmas miracle in that I was able to complete the MRI's. I am very claustrophobic and can allow doctors to prod my bone marrow with 12 inch needles without sedation, but a painless scan forces shivers down my spine.
I took my praise and worship CD and the technician was a Christian with an IPOD full of Christian music by my favorite artists. She played that for me and talked me through both MRI's - they took over an hour and I kept looking back over the top of my head and could see the ceiling tile grids - they formed a perfect cross over the top of me. I kept telling myself if Jesus could and would hang on a cross for me, surely I could survive the MRI, with His help. And I did!
There were no fractures in the hip structure (due to chronic steroid use). The signals in the marrow were altered and my NIH leukemia specialist suspects that this is caused by the marrow being so impacted by leukemia that the normal fat or hematopoietic (blood forming) cells are not producing normal marrow signals. The NIH is going to review these MRI films and reports to offer us more information.
The MRI on my lower back revealed complete loss of bone marrow signal intensity. If my bones are this impacted by the leukemia, no wonder I am in such pain. Three herniated discs are also contributing to my pain concerns. The radiologist did not feel the discs were such that steroid injections into the nerve roots would be beneficial for me, so that pain relief option is off the table.
Please pray for 2010 to bring me another year of life, no matter the battles I must face and fight. Please pray for God to be merciful and to hear our cries to protect me from life-threatening infections and bone marrow failure.
"Twas the Night Before Christmas Revisited
.....Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house
How many times have I read and recited this classic to my children? Too many times to enumerate. Although the classic represents the secular Santa side of Christmas, the words enthrall children and adults alike.
......Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse
This year my husband purchased the Hallmark version of Twas the Night Before Christmas. New to the time honored classic was the recordable features of the story book. The purchaser of the Hallmark book is able to read and record themselves as they recite the story. In theory, we thought it would be a wonderful, timeless gift for our Grandson if I recorded myself reading the book to him.
......The stockings were hung by the chimney with care
Little did I know what a challenge to my spirit recording this book would pose. Each week of December I added "Record Book" to my Outlook reminders. And each week would pass and I would glance at the book and tear up, pondering if this reading of Twas the Night Before Christmas would be my final reading of it for my grandson. After all, May 2009 delivered the label, "end stage leukemia" to me and I knew, apart from God's intervention, Christmas 2009 could very well be my final Christmas.
........In hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there
After ignoring the Outlook reminders too many times, December 24th arrived and the book sat on the counter, unread, unrecorded and unwrapped. At the urging of my husband, I sat down near midnight and opened the book before me. For a second, I choked up and had one of my moments of doubt when I wondered if another Christmas would be blessed upon me.
....The children were nestled all snug in their beds
I mustered the strength and fortitude that I could in and of myself, then I cried out to God to enable me to complete this recording and to be able to present this priceless gift to my grandson. The tears dried up, my voice stopped quivering and with the love and excitement that I read this story to my own children through the years, I read it, once again for Lil Man. I thank God for giving me the ability to read the story - on this past Christmas Eve and hopefully, for many, many more Christmas Eves in my future will I be able to read this classic, in person, to Lil Man.
How many times have I read and recited this classic to my children? Too many times to enumerate. Although the classic represents the secular Santa side of Christmas, the words enthrall children and adults alike.
......Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse
This year my husband purchased the Hallmark version of Twas the Night Before Christmas. New to the time honored classic was the recordable features of the story book. The purchaser of the Hallmark book is able to read and record themselves as they recite the story. In theory, we thought it would be a wonderful, timeless gift for our Grandson if I recorded myself reading the book to him.
......The stockings were hung by the chimney with care
Little did I know what a challenge to my spirit recording this book would pose. Each week of December I added "Record Book" to my Outlook reminders. And each week would pass and I would glance at the book and tear up, pondering if this reading of Twas the Night Before Christmas would be my final reading of it for my grandson. After all, May 2009 delivered the label, "end stage leukemia" to me and I knew, apart from God's intervention, Christmas 2009 could very well be my final Christmas.
........In hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there
After ignoring the Outlook reminders too many times, December 24th arrived and the book sat on the counter, unread, unrecorded and unwrapped. At the urging of my husband, I sat down near midnight and opened the book before me. For a second, I choked up and had one of my moments of doubt when I wondered if another Christmas would be blessed upon me.
....The children were nestled all snug in their beds
I mustered the strength and fortitude that I could in and of myself, then I cried out to God to enable me to complete this recording and to be able to present this priceless gift to my grandson. The tears dried up, my voice stopped quivering and with the love and excitement that I read this story to my own children through the years, I read it, once again for Lil Man. I thank God for giving me the ability to read the story - on this past Christmas Eve and hopefully, for many, many more Christmas Eves in my future will I be able to read this classic, in person, to Lil Man.
Sunday, December 27, 2009
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