A Lily from A Local State Park

My Life Testimony

At the young age of eight or nine, I began attending a Wednesday night children's program. One of my friends and I went together to Awana. I know now that it was not an accident that I attended -- it was by divine appointment. During one of those programs, I accepted Jesus as my Personal Savior. I will never forget that night in the 1970's or the dear lady who prayed the prayer of salvation with me. Instantly, I became a new creature in Christ. A couple of years ago, I read her obituary in the local newspaper and knew that the Lord had given her a "well done, thy good and faithful servant."

Unfortunately, little spiritual growth took place in the following years. Most of my life was led as a moral person, believing that good deeds were all that was required to get into Heaven. Good deeds are not what He asks of us. He asks for a repentant heart, our worship, submission to His Word, and a powerful dependence upon Him. Although I had accepted Christ as my Savior, He certainly was not Lord of my life. I was His child and He had written my name in the Lamb's Book of Life, yet, I only knew about Him. I was on a journey to know Him and to experience Him in His fullness.

Three realms of influence have contributed most to my spiritual growth and discipleship -- people, problems, and praise. People. I think of three people who have most discipled me on my Christian walk. Shortly after I was married, the Lord placed a faithful servant in our lives. Wilma was the wife of one of my husband's employees. She discipled and mentored me for many years. She was faithful to pray for me, encourage me, and teach me. I will never forget how she and her husband traveled over 700 miles to come to our side when one of our premature babies had surgery. We had no idea that they were coming. The nurses had just taken our baby girl from my arms and were walking her to the operating room. I had collapsed on the floor, sobbing with heartache. When I lifted up my head, there stood Wilma and her husband. She actively lived out what she taught and believed.

During the early years of our marriage and motherhood, I grew in my Christian walk, but upon reflection, I know that although I was justified through Him, the process of complete surrender and sanctification was just underway. The second person who mentored me on my life journey was Pastor Mathias. He was our pastor from 1991-1998. I have never met a man who personified holiness in all that he said and did, like Pastor Mathias exemplified. He walked the walk and talked the talk. It was during those years that I rededicated my life to Christ and made the steps necessary to completely surrender all that I was and all that I wanted to become to the Lord. I recall in 1994 telling my husband that I had found true peace and joy in my life.

Karen, the wife of our Pastor in the late 1990's and early years of the twenty-first century, is the third person to have a profound on my impact on my growth as a Christian. I met Karen in 1998. She is a faith-filled woman of God and she built my faith for healing once I was diagnosed with leukemia. She and her husband challenged my faith as a Christian and corrected me when I wavered at bad reports from my doctors. Karen helped me to be more faithful in praising through the difficult times of life. She was a teacher who exemplified what a leader in the Body of Christ should personify. I pray I will become a leader like Karen. She reminded me of Nehemiah -- full of prayer, always seeking God's direction, prepared to do spiritual warfare, motivating of those around her, and undaunted by the biggest tasks that God assigns. If God used Nehemiah to rebuild the wall in 52 days, I KNOW that He can take a humble servant like me and work through me to do mighty deeds.

Problems. "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials or many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything" (James 1:2-4). My life has been replete with trials and tribulations. I have always attempted to make the most of every life event and to see God's hand moving in these situations.

These are the "facts" and "reports" of man. We have nearly lost all three of our daughters after birth. I nearly lost my life in 1990 when I developed a blood clot in my lung. And when I was diagnosed with leukemia, we had no medical insurance since two of our children had pre-existing medical conditions that made purchasing insurance nearly impossible.

Now I will state the "truth": God has been faithful to our family. He has restored health, touched and healed our sick bodies, Jehovah Jirah has provided for all of our needs, jobs have been replaced, and He has been a God of restoration. Our God is a God who keeps all His loving promises. He has put the desire in my heart to be a light and a voice for Him and His Kingdom. And for as long as He has ordained for me to live on this earth, I will be those things for Him.

Praise. In order to count all of these trials as pure joy, praise has had to be present in my life. I take praise and worship music with me to the hospital. I take my MP3 player along with praise music to scans, IV treatments, and other medical adventures. The garment of praise definitely removes the spirit of heaviness in my life. We can choose to be downcast and depressed over our life situations, or we can trust God and praise Him as we wait for our heartfelt prayers to manifest.

The Lord has revealed to me, over and over again, that this illness will bring glory to God and will be a tool used to see the salvation of my lost family members and others seeking a relationship with God. This has been my prayer. And God is answering. Several of our family members have accepted Christ in the past few years and several others are asking and seeking.

Through these people, problems, and praises, I have grown to know and love Him deeper with each passing year. He is my Everything. He is my Hope and my Healer. He is my Life and my Love. I only want to be as faithful to Him as He has been to me. I am thankful that despite the hardship and adversity that I have encountered in my life, that the Lord has encouraged me to remain faithful. I look forward to seeing future generations of my family continue this legacy of faith.

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

It has been two weeks since I traveled to OSU to seek their input and recommendations for the treatment of this leukemia. Today, I am no closer to making a decision than I was two weeks ago. I am scheduled to return to OSU in mid-August to confer with the specialists about what decision I have arrived at.

I am fortunate and blessed to have a mind that is inquisitive and a seeker of knowledge. On the other hand, assembling all of this data and information tends to muddy the waters of my decision making process. In my opinion, there are a couple of treatment options worth consideration.

I was sold on the recommendation to use low-dose splenic irradiation. I had completed my research, consulted with a radiation oncologist, and was moving in that direction. Then support from my local doctor as well as the OSU specialist was non-existent. Without local support, the radiation oncologist said he would not proceed. Door closed.

http://www.thegreenjournal.com/article/S0167-8140(00)00316-9/abstract

I could return to Rituxan, the monoclonal antibody that was the last treatment I received. I have had a serious, life-threatening reaction to this drug, but it did give me a few years with the leukemia being relatively calm, although a remission was never achieved. Some experts are using low-dose versions of this protocol and that is intriguing to me, but again, I've had difficulty obtaining support from physicians for this protocol. It is available as a clinical trial at the NIH, but I do not know if I am up to the travel again.

http://clinicaltrials.gov/ct2/show/NCT00366418

The OSU specialist is eager for me to use the drug Revlimid. It is an immuno-modulating drug that works in a different method than typical chemotherapeutic drugs. This drug would have to be taken in the context of a clinical trial at OSU. Some travel would be involved, but OSU is much closer than Washington, DC. My concern with this drug is the potential for serious, life-threatening side effects.

http://clltopics.org/Chemo/Revlimid.htm

The "king" of all CLL treatments is transplant -- either stem cell or cord blood transplant. I am not a person known to take risks, and most transplants offer a 50% chance of death from the procedure. It is (outside of God's intervention) the only medical treatment that has any potential for my having a new immune system established and a shot at a normal life expectancy. Big risks. Big rewards.

http://bethesdatrials.cancer.gov/clinical-research/search_detail.aspx?ProtocolID=NCI-07-C-0195

The last option, which is one that I am seriously considering, is to do absolutely nothing. There is no known cure. When I read through hundreds of pages of data, this is the, albeit sobering, bottom line. Yet, it is the human spirit to fight for life and follow the medical experts. Do I have the courage to disengage from conventional medicine and simply live out what time God has appointed for me?

For those of you who are information junkies like myself, I have inserted links after each treatment option. If you review any of this information and have a brilliant revelation, please share it with me.

I appreciate your prayers as I continue to travel toward a treatment decision.

"May the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, give to you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him" Ephesians 1:17

Advice for Daily Living from the Book of Ephesians

Bear with one another in love.
Endeavor to keep the unity of the Spirit.
Be renewed in the spirit of your mind.
Put away lying.
Do not let the sun go down on your wrath.
Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth.
Do not grieve the Holy Spirit.
Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil
speaking be put away from you.
Be kind to one another.
Be imitators of God.
Walk in love.
Walk as children of light.
Have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness,
but rather expose them.
Do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the
Lord is.
Give thanks always.
Children, obey your parents.
Know that whatever good anyone does, he will receive
the same from the Lord.
Be strong in the Lord.

Forget the War Against Terror – We are Fighting Germ Warfare

U.S. President George W. Bush articulated the goals of the "war on terrorism" in a September 20, 2001 speech, in which he said it "will not end until every terrorist group of global reach has been found, stopped, and defeated".

Forget the war on terror, we are a nation fighting germ warfare. It’s a similar war that involves finding, stopping, and defeating an enemy invisible to the naked eye. Citizens from sea to shining sea are aptly focused on eradicating each and every germ about to gain entrance into their homes, vehicles, or businesses.

Gaze at store aisles today and one will note a plethora of anti-germ agents. Hand sanitizers, antibacterial wipes, soaps, sprays, and cleaners are but a sampling of the weapons against America’s war against germs. As a child, I never recall my mother frantically searching for an antibacterial wipe to clean the grocery cart before she sat me in the seat. And we never used hand sanitizer before dining out. We happily played in the dirt of our backyard with little regard to the fungi lurking in the sandbox. This germ warfare has certainly taken the fun our of living freely.

In principal, eliminating silent germs perching on each and every surface, sounds like a good plan of attack. However, some research in laboratories has shown that our germ warfare is contributing to the development of superbugs such as MRSA that become resistant to common drugs. However, other researchers believe that antibacterial products do not lead to resistant bugs.

Shocking to most soldiers engaged in germ warfare are recent findings that plain old-fashioned soap and water is as effective for eradicating germs as the antibacterial products. An article from WebMD quoted researcher Allison Aiello, PhD as stating, “Antibacterial soaps do not provide a benefit above and beyond plain soaps for generally healthy people living in the community."

Losing the war on germs are hospitals. The very places where the ill go, expecting to be healed, have turned into literal germ war zone. Superbugs have invaded some of the best hospitals in America. Limited budgets prevent education of staff members and patients about the risks associated with unsanitary practices. Worst yet, hospital staffs become negligent with hand washing and other preventive measures that protect patients against hospital acquired infections.

I personally have been the recipient of more than one hospital acquired infections. On one account, I was admitted to the hospital to receive a treatment to help my body to fight infections. Instead, I returned home and twenty-hour hours later, I was readmitted to the hospital with C difficile. According to the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, C difficile is responsible for at least 5000 deaths each year in the United States. Basic hand hygiene and expert cleaning and decontamination of hospital rooms could have prevented many of these deaths. Basic hand washing has been overlooked with the arrival of alcohol-based hand sanitizers.

Being severely immunocompromised due a lengthy battle with leukemia, I have become acutely aware of the many unlikely places that a terrorist germ might be lurking, waiting to attack my fragile immune system. Some might recall the boy in the plastic bubble film from many years ago. At times, I feel like that young man. I’m constantly on alert for an invasion of terrorist threats poised to wreck havoc in my body. Some might call me a mysophobiac (someone with an unusual concern about contamination or dirt) but so be it. I have learned after too many hospitalizations to count that being proactive with germ warfare benefits me and my quality of life.

Grab the hand sanitizers and soap and go on the offensive. MRSA and VRSA will not be the victors of this war against germs.

Divine Protection

It is important that when we consider Job of the Old Testament, that we note that very real spiritual darkness and forces were at work to misplace and upset one of God’s servants. It is all too easy to point fingers at God when our worlds are upset and our hearts are ripped in two. Yet, as God’s children we must step back from the very hurt and heartache that is impeding our Christian walk and remind ourselves of the darkness that attempts to envelope us. Return to the first Chapter of Job. Satan’s attack on Job, his family, his health, and his possessions is plotted, planned and executed by a very real enemy.

"And the Lord said to Satan, 'From where do you come?’

So Satan answered the Lord and said, ‘From going to and fro on the earth, and from walking back and forth on it.’

Then the Lord said to Satan, ‘Have you considered My servant Job, that there is none like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, one who fears God and shuns evil?’

So Satan answered the Lord and said, ‘Does Job fear for nothing? Have You not made a hedge around him, around his household, and around all that he has on every side? You have blessed the work of his hands, and his possessions have increased in the land. But now, stretch out Your hand and touch all that he has, and he will surely curse You to Your face!’

And the Lord said to Satan, ‘Behold all that he has is in your power; only do not lay a hand on his person’.” (Job 1:6b-12)

Several noteworthy points demand our attention. Satan is a very real force to be dealt with in the spiritual realm. If you believe he is dressed in red and rarely leaves his hellish domain, you are mistaken. Here Satan had an outright discussion with God. He had been checking out the scene on earth. Satan knew who God's servants were. He knew who followed the Lord and who didn’t. He knew who had what, said what and did what.

On the other hand Satan was very aware of the Lord’s protection around Job. He recognized a "hedge of protection" around a man, his family and his property when he saw it. Does that not inspire you to go engage in spiritual warfare and enlist the Lord’s army of angels to entrench your property, loved ones, and self with His hedge of divine protection? Just as it was thousands of years ago in Job’s age, that kind of hedge protection is available to believers today.

In the 1990s’ our family went out to dinner with our best friends. From the natural viewpoint of life, that seemed like an innocent enough event. Our conversation that night turned to divine protection. And to hostage situations and to everyday dangers we face in everyday places. That night I was reminded and prompted to fervently pray for protection for my family.

The following day my husband called and told me to turn on the television. There was a hostage situation that had erupted at a restaurant next to his office. Not only had he been protected and had not entered that restaurant as he often did each morning, but also God’s faithfulness had prompted us to have this discussion on hostage situations the night before. That discussion had prompted me to spend extra time praying that night for that hedge of protection to be placed around my family.

To this day, when I recall the photos my husband took of sniper teams on top of his office on that day, I am reminded and rejoice at God’s protection. What we anticipated as only being a night of pizza was designed by His hand to prompt us to pray for that hedge of protection around our families.

Little Man's Nursery Sign At Our Home

Me? A Grandma?

In a few short weeks, I will become a Grandma for the first time. It’s humorous that as a child when I envisioned Grandmas, they didn’t look and act like ME. Grandmas wore their hair in buns (grey buns) and wore flowered frocks about the house. Granny’s baked bread and crocheted afghans. Grandmas smelled like muscle rub.

Last time I inspected, I didn’t locate a single, solitary grey hair (but then again I am in need of trifocals, so I might not have seen the grey hairs!). And although my Mom was convinced that I needed to wear my hair in a bun for every school photo, I’ve not been a bun connoisseur in decades. I prefer jeans and tennis shoes to frocks and florals and I tend to avoid muscle rub. After all, I’m not THAT old.

Has there been a Granny Revolution right before our eyes? I believe so. Unbeknownst to most of us, Grandmas have gone hip! Modern medicine has helped people to live longer and better. Modern cosmetics have made women appear to look better for their age. Modern technology has brought Grandmas from the age of knitting to cell phones, laptops, and blogging.

Yet in the midst of the Granny Revolution, one thing remains absolutely solidified: Grandmothers love their grandchildren. I can’t imagine any gift more wonderful than a grandchild. I will get to love and spoil him and then return to sender. My eyes begin to water when I envision the birth of Little Man in my imagination. I try to picture the emotions, the beauty, the joy of that upcoming moment. I believe it will be beyond description with mere words.

When Little Man is placed in this Grandma’s arms for the first time, I am certain my heart will melt. My heart will be instantly stolen. And it won’t even matter that I will step over into the ranks of Grandmothers. Bring on the grey hairs and even the crochet needles! I am honored to be called Grammy.

Victory

I refuse to be discouraged, to be sad, or cry,
I refuse to be downhearted and here's the reason why....
I have a God who's mighty, who's sovereign and supreme.
I have a God who loves me and I am on His team.

He is all wise and powerful, Jesus is His Name.
Though everything is changeable, my God remains the same.
My God knows all that's happening, beginning to the end
His presence is my comfort, He is my dearest friend.

When sickness comes to weaken me, to bring my head down low,
I call upon my Mighty God, into His arms I go.
When circumstances threaten to rob me from my peace,
He draws me close unto His breast, where all my sufferings cease.

And when my heart melts within me, and weakness takes control,
He gathers me into his arms, he soothes my heart and soul.
The great I AM is with me, my life is in His hand.
The Son of God is my hope, it's in His strength I stand.

I refuse to be defeated, my eyes are on my God.
He has promised to be with me, as through this life I trod.
I'm looking past all my circumstances to Heaven's throne above,
My prayers have reached the heart of God, I'm resting on His love.

I give God thanks in everything, my eyes are on His face.
The battle is His, the victory is mine, He'll help me win this race.

-Author Unknown

His Words: My Strength

Words from the Bible that I have written in the back of my Bible. I read and reread these Scriptures when I am sick or in the hospital. God has touched my body and healed me too many times to count.

I shall be restored to health.
Daughter, your faith has made you well.
Death and life are in the power of the tongue.
By His striped I am healed and made whole.
God's Words are life to those who find them and health to all their flesh.
He sent His Word and healed me.
The tongue of the wise promotes health.
My strength and health are restored.
You have given your angels charge over me.
I hope in Your Word.
This is my comfort in affliction, Your Word has given me life.
Your Word has given me life.
The things which are impossible with men, are possible with God.
God -- who gives life to the dead and calls those things which do not exist as though they did.
Pray without ceasing.

More Songs for the Soul

"Jesus Messiah" by Chris Tomlin

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=rlBAf_SKwPQ&feature=related

"You Are Everything" by Matthew West

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=nvY-7iXX1Ok

"Call on Jesus" by Nicole C. Mullen

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=lSc0JRpomR4

Dining Out With Dignity

My grandparents traveled extensively. Having dined in the finest restaurants around the world, my Grandmother relished the elegant ambiance and culinary delights that a fine restaurant offered. At the age of 85, she continues to keep a white, linen tablecloth on her table. Dining was always a sensory experience for Grandma. Not surprisingly, all of this changed when our twin daughters and their baby sister arrived within fifteen months of each other.

Dinner time dramatically changed with the passage of our three children into the toddler years. Along with their increasing interest in food, also came the decline and ruination of our peaceful mealtimes. Linen place mats and tablecloths were replaced by plastic-vinyl-indestructible everything. Colorful plastic dishes and utensils emblazoned with cartoon favorites forced the china and silver into storage. Massive "drop cloths" placed under their hook-on-the-table seats attempted to catch spills and drops. One toddler dropping peas and spilling milk is adequate to evoke dining chaos. You can imagine the havoc that three toddles simultaneously learning to eat evoked.

I recall the memorable photograph that I sent to my Mother who lived seven hundred miles away. Wanting her to witness the girls' development firsthand, I proudly sent the photo. Grinning faces smeared with the beta carotene of cooked carrots and enough food on the tabletop to feed a Third World nation for months, shocked her. An immediate call from my mother, urged the implementation of more stringent table manners. After all, they would grow up to become ladies one day and might need to know how to master a knife and fork.

My husband and I debated the pros and cons surrounding the dilemma. While it was easier (and probably more satisfying to the girls) to allow them this endeavor in eating, we opted to begin initiating some new rules. Having been a childless couple who had always enjoyed dining out, we chose to begin introducing the girls to restaurant dining.

Ironically, my Grandmother (the lady who always viewed dining out as a pleasurable experience) came to visit near the time that we made this dining out decision. Not wanting to delay our children's introduction to Restaurant Dining 101, Great Grandma was invited to accompany us on this new adventure.

Opting for a family-type steak house instead of our favorite French cafe', we loaded our girls and Great Grandma into the car. We attempted to prepare "Great" for the possible scenario that we could encounter -- flying finger foods, crumbled crackers, and massive food remains buried beneath the table. She consoled us with her persistent rhetoric that included "everyone will understand with three small children" and "they are such good little girls, I know they will do just fine!" Obviously, "Great" had not witnessed the girls' eating attempts since the tidy act of breast feeding.

As expected, we began our evening with the frantic search for three high chairs. Two high chairs and one booster seat later, we were seated. All the while we were deciding on our menu choices, Grandma was doling out crackers. The cellophane pile began to mount as crackers crunched everywhere. Still in control of the situation, Grandma defended her actions by announcing, "I know crackers are a bit messy, but they are keeping the girls occupied."

Opting to take turns at the salad bar, we each took turns, keeping diligent watch over the toddlers while each other filled their plates. Little attention did I pay to the discretely placed salad bar sign that read, " NO SHARING". That is, little attention was given to the sign until Grandma returned with her place piled a mile high. She began the fine art of salad bar sharing. There was gelatin salad for one girl and crisp carrot sticks for another. Crunchy croutons were given to our youngest, teething toddler. Not certain of the penalties that were enforced for salad bar sharing, I nervously scanned the room. Illusions of my Grandma being escorted out by the salad bar enforcer or (gasp!) being charged full price for three additional salad bars startled me.

As Grandma had predicted, the tidbits of food continued to entertain and occupy little hands and mouths until our dinner was served. Having ordered one meal off of the children's menu, I began the time consuming process of dividing portions onto three small plates. By the time I had given each of the girls their dinner, my husband and grandmother had nearly finished their meals. Reflecting on the situation, I should have asked Grandma to divide up their food so that she would not have had idle time at the end of her meal to notice the growing landfill underneath our table.

Fine dining memories flashed before her at that moment. So much for the dignified dining experiences of her travels. Quietly, she excused herself and walked away. Was she that offended that she would abandon us at the restaurant?

This proved not to be the case. Smiling, Grandma returned to the table with a damp washcloth and portable sweeper. Silently, she wiped sticky fingers and smudged faces. The cellophane wrapper pile quickly disappeared into her handbag and with an indiscreet swipe of the sweeper, she erased any evidence on the floor that could be traced to our family.

Quite stunned by how quickly and effectively Grandma had tidied up the girls and their surroundings, we departed the restaurant. Nervously spewing apologies to Grandma for the
"chaotic dinnertime and its aftermath", Grandma stopped me.

Her simplistic explanation silenced all my qualms about future dining out experiences with our children. She began, "As parents, you must remember that no matter who is dining next to you in a restaurant, be it a celebrity or the President of the United States, that he was a baby and a toddler at one point in his life." She continued, " Just like your little girls, I'm certain most of those people in that restaurant wrecked havoc at restaurants just like we witnessed tonight."

I smiled in relief to Grandma's common sense advice and knew that going out to dinner would be an easier and more relaxed task from that day forth.

Author's Note: The three small destructors of dining matured into fine young ladies, all capable of eating with utensils.

The "Most Funnest" Place

Reflections from my service at an inner-city program for children and teenagers.

One evening as I shared dinner with a table of rambunctious children at the Community Center, a six-year old little girl told me: "This is the most funnest place I've ever been!" In a world filled with amusement parks and video games and entertainment of every kind imaginable, I was struck by the simplicity of what was considered "fun" to this child. And once again, the importance of the work being done at the Center was driven home in my heart.

Fun does abound at the Community Center. Heartache and hopelessness do frequent the doorways as well, yet in the midst of those emotions, we traveled to the planetarium, looked through a telescope, tried out scuba diving, visited with a ferret, began 4-H, kicked our way through soccer clinic, and danced with our new jazz and ballet instructor. Wow! That does sound fun, doesn't it? On top of all of this "fun", the children are physically fed through the Grumbling Tummies' Cafe' that serves thousands of free meals each year. Spiritual food is offered through nightly Chapel services and Bible studies.

Each day I ask myself what we can offer the children and families of this impoverished neighborhood. Most of them have lives that are difficult and complicated. Through their young eyes, it must be a challenge to discover how to have fun and happiness in the midst of a neighborhood replete with poverty, single-parent households, drugs and alcohol abuse, and crime.

Christ commanded us to, "Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you, and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age." (Matthew 28:10-20). Just as He commanded, the Community Center's staff is listening and being obedient servants. God could foresee the lives of these children and He knew that these tremendous needs would exist in this inner-city neighborhood. In His infinite wisdom, He assembled resources and servants to operate this program. He has called and equipped us to be His hands and His mouth to these hurting children.

This Scripture quoted from Matthew contains the vital reminder that "He is with us always". This promise reminds us that He will provide the strength, faith, and protection that we need to serve here. Apart from God, we labor in vain.

A Prayer for Today: July 27, 2008

My Precious Lord,We are forever grateful for the mercy and forgiveness you have extended to us. You alone have rescued us over and over from ourselves. Your patience has been amazing - never giving up on us, even when we fail You.

I praise you God for being willing to sacrifice your own Son for us. My human mind cannot fathom that type of love and passion for a lost world. Time after time, You alone have heard our prayers and seen our tears and rescued us. You have answered prayers too numerous to list.

And for those prayers, we have been tempted to believe that were not answered, we know eternity will reveal how You alone were working in the midst of those situations, as well. We could not have made it through the trials and tribulations of this life without YOU. You alone have been our Peace, our Hope, our Sustainer, our Healer, our Everything.

In the dark of night, in the loneliness of the hospital room, in the midst of pain too difficult to describe, You have stood guard and comforted and counseled and consoled us. Your Word has been our constant companion.

We are regretful for the days we never looked at your Word to seek its power and teachings. How our lives could have been different if we had learned more of you and obeyed more of Your Teachings. Help us to be more faithful to You and Your Word. We want to absorb more and more of your Word – it is life to those who find it and health to all their flesh. You alone know the pain and suffering in each broken body represented on this forum. And I am convinced that many of us would have died long ago had it not been for Your constant, abiding presence and healings that you have granted to so many of us.

Father, we long to be well. Strengthen us and help us to feel better. Show us what you want each of us to do on earth. Remove anything that we may want to do, and in its place, plant what YOU want us to achieve with our lives. We want the privilege to be of eternal value to your Kingdom. We want a Kingdom-assignment or position that is God-granted and Spirit-supervised.

Lord, I will write, but I need for You to breathe words into my flesh, otherwise, the words will be empty and void. Your Words never return void and I seek that type of power and presentation with the words I write and pray. You know how I long to see my family saved and serving you. I long to see them overcome with the desire to love and serve you in these last days. I long for the Rapture where we can meet you in the sky as the trumpet sounds. No death or graves for us. Come Lord Jesus to meet us in the sky. I love you and praise you for all you do for us.In my Precious Savior’s Name I pray. Amen.

Six Weeks and Counting

We are fast approaching the arrival of our first grandchild. Preparations are under way! If my health permits, I will be his Nanny when his Mommy and Daddy return to work and to graduate school. And since he will be spending many days with his Grammy, we felt that we should have our own nursery at our home.

With our daughters all grown and raised, we have an abundance of vacated bedrooms, so there was plenty of real estate for the addition of the nursery. Grandpa and Grandma have been busy at work. The room has a Noah’s Ark theme and Grandpa did a great paint job with stripes that would make HGTV quite proud! He could be the next HGTV Design Star.

Today we went to purchase a crib and mattress for the nursery. Naturally, we had to pick up a “few” other items. We had to select a bathtub in the event the little man decided to have an ultimate mess while visiting. And with the bathtub purchase, we definitely needed to pick up baby soap, wipes, a comb and brush. It’s amazing at how much paraphernalia a baby requires.

Next we purchased a baby monitor. The only monitors we had when our daughters were young were called eyes and ears. Nowadays, everything from television monitors to movement monitors to monitors that detect the slightest whimper fill the aisles of the baby superstores. My husband felt we probably didn’t need the monitor because I will most likely sit in my rocking chair in the nursery and watch him sleep. He knows me pretty well after 25+ years.

Since I will pick up Little Man in the mornings, he will be traveling a lot with his Grammy. Given that infant car seats are rear facing, we decided I needed a mirror that mounts on the back window and reflects into my rear-view mirror so that I can watch our little man. One infant purchase demands another. Marketing geniuses have this baby shopping figured out. Parents (or doting grandparents) purchase a car seat. I am all for car seats. (After all, I am from the generation who stood in the center of the front seat as a toddler waiting to be catapulted out the front window when Mom hit the brakes.) Now, after the car seat is decided upon, there are headrests that fit inside the car seat to support the baby’s head. And once you buy the headrest for the car seat, there are soft, supports that wrap around the headrest straps so the baby’s face isn’t irritated. Then there are toys to fasten onto the car seat. Lastly, don’t forget window shades and the BABY ON BOARD sign while you are shopping.

How did babies ever survive before the advent of the baby superstore?

From Our Gardens

Food for Thought

"Tell me what you eat, and
I will tell you what you are.”

--Anthelme Brillat-Savarin

Most famous French epicure and gastronome and often considered
the father of the low-carbohydrate diet

Live Well, Eat Well: The Antioxidant Connection

Below is an article I wrote for a medical nonprofit organization's electronic newsletter.

The medical research community and media have inundated the general public with positive reports regarding the antioxidant connection to health benefits. Research has confirmed that diets rich in foods and beverages such as red wines, dark chocolates, cocoa, and certain fruits have multiple health benefits.

Antioxidants, found in foods and beverages discussed later in this article, have the ability to act as “scavengers” by neutralizing destructive “free radicals” in the human body. Normally, the body’s defense system destroys the free radicals. However, when stress, medical conditions, pollution, or other conditions weaken the body’s capability to destroy the free radicals, damage to the body may occur. Cancer, heart disease, early aging, and other chronic disease may develop. Antioxidants may reduce the plaque that clogs arteries and can lead to heart attacks and strokes.

Recently in Spain, researchers announced that cocoa contains more than 600 chemicals that may help to fight cancer, heart disease, rheumatism, stress, and protect the immune system.

Dr. Kris-Etherton of Penn State University believes that compounds found in cocoa also have the potential to keep arteries flexible and increase blood flow. He states, “My research shows that a diet containing about an ounce of chocolate a day increases good cholesterol and prevents bad cholesterol from oxidizing, a process that may lead to heart disease.” Consumers are urged to not overindulge in chocolate but to include it with a healthy diet including nuts and fruits.

Research has proven that the following foods and beverages will give you the most antioxidant bang for your buck!

BEVERAGES: Red Wines, Elderberry Juice, Prune Juice
FRUITS: Cranberries, Red Grapes, Apples, Melons, Nectarines, Oranges, White Grapes, and Strawberries

Sources:

Phenol Antioxidant Quantity and Quality in Foods: Fruits (Vinson JA, Su X, Zubik L, Bose P)
Department of Chemistry, University of Scranton, Scranton, PA, USA)

Antioxidant Properties of Commercial Alcoholic and Nonalcoholic Beverages (Lugasi A, Hovari J). National Institute of Food Hygiene and Nutrition, H-1097 Budapest, Gyali ut 3/1., Hungary)

Clinical Trials

Most cancer patients will be confronted with the decision to participate in a clinical trial or not. Clinical trials are vital to the advancement of medical sciences. Researchers recruit participants for their trials. Dosages for drugs are determined. Dose limiting toxicities are observed. Side effects and complications are determined.

However, as a patient who has participated in a clinical trial and who is considering whether or not to participate in another clinical trial, I would highly recommend considering several factors first before signing the consent form.

Most importantly, you need to be aware of the risks, benefits, and specific details of the treatment being proposed to you in the context of the clinical trial. Be certain to ask about all treatment options that are available to you. I always want to know what additional testing will be required of me in order to be a trial participant. Also, since I take many medications, I want to know if the eligibility criteria for the clinical trial will allow for me to continue on current medications and supplements.

It is worth asking if you are allowed to speak to currently enrolled trial participants. If that option is not available to you, most all trials have a clinical research nurse to whom you can direct your specific concerns and questions about the research associated with the clinical trial.

Be certain that you know how your insurance company will respond to your participation in a clinical trial. While several states have passed legislature that requires insurance companies to pay for routine care associated with participation in a clinical trial, many states remain without such laws. Visit this website to learn more about your state's laws regarding insurance and clinical trials: http://www.cancer.org/docroot/ETO/content/ETO_6_2x_State_Laws_Regarding_Clinical_Trials.asp

Most participants will want to know what phase of research does the trial represent? My personality tends to be conservative by nature. A Phase IV would be more comfortable than a Phase I trial for me to consider. Clinical trials are often described by "phase". According to the NCI, phases of clinical trials are:

Phase I trials: These first studies in people evaluate how a new drug should be given (by mouth, injected into the blood, or injected into the muscle), how often, and what dose is safe. A phase I trial usually enrolls only a small number of patients, sometimes as few as a dozen.

Phase II trials: A phase II trial continues to test the safety of the drug, and begins to evaluate how well the new drug works. Phase II studies usually focus on a particular type of cancer.

Phase III trials: These studies test a new drug, a new combination of drugs, or a new surgical procedure in comparison to the current standard. A participant will usually be assigned to the standard group or the new group at random (called randomization). Phase III trials often enroll large numbers of people and may be conducted at many doctors' offices, clinics, and cancer centers nationwide.

In addition, after a treatment has been approved and is being marketed, the drug's maker may study it further in a phase IV trial. The purpose of phase IV trials is to evaluate the side effects, risks, and benefits of a drug over a longer period of time and in a larger number of people than in phase III clinical trials. Thousands of people are involved in a phase IV trial.

Many financial concerns and questions must be answered for clinical trial participants. Will you be compensated for your participation? Many clinical trial sponsors do not reimburse participants for their participation, time, travel, and other costs. Some clinical trial sponsors have small reimbursements available for participants. These are all questions and concerns most participants need to consider (unless you are very wealthy and money is not an issue).

I had the opportunity to be a clinical trial participant at the National Cancer Institute (NCI) in Bethesda, Maryland. The NCI is part of the National Institutes of Health (NIH), one of our nation's premier sponsors of medical research. At the NCI, after I made my first trip and enrolled in the clinical trial, my travel expenses were covered by the NIH. Airfare, a food per diam allowance, lodging, and the cost of ALL care provided at the NCI were free of charge. I must admit the NIH is one of the most exceptional uses of government funds that I have ever witnessed.

If your personal physician has not recommended a specific clinical trial, yet you are interested in this approach to treatment, you might wonder how to locate clinical trials available to you? The NCI's website, http://www.cancer.gov/ is an exceptional resource for locating clinical trials for cancer patients. On their search engine you can specify if you want information on trials only at the NIH Clinical Center in Bethesda, or if you want to review clinical trials at other facilities around the country.

From a patient's perspective, I will offer some reflections about my participation in a clinical trial. Although my travel expenses were paid for by the clinical trial center, I quickly learned that the amount of travel involved was tiring. Being away from my family came with a price as well. I became very ill at one point while enrolled in the clinical trial. I was almost 700 miles from my family and ended up in an Intensive Care Unit. At that moment in time, all I wanted was to have my family nearby.

Obviously, when enrolled in most clinical trials, as a participant, you will be separated from your familiar medical team. Participants need to be willing to adjust and adapt to new people, new environments, and new approaches to their care and treatment. Sometimes the care in a clinical trial tends to be a bit impersonal. On the other hand, some research centers are quite skilled at coordinating the many details of complicated cases in a personable fashion.

There is a deep sense of personal satisfaction knowing that you have done something to contribute to finding a cure or a better treatment for the disease you are battling. This was one of my greatest revelations regarding clinical trial participation. I have also donated tissue, blood, and DNA for research purposes. By participating, to whatever degree, in medical research, most patients will discover that they are empowered and energized by doing their part for science.

On Genesis

The opening book of the Holy Bible provides us with a detailed account of the creation of everything, including man and woman. It is truly a book of beginnings. The creation account is followed by the destructive first sin and the fall of man from perfect communion with a Holy God. Man's sinfulness continues to separate him from God and increases in wickedness. God then destroys the earth and its inhabitants with the Flood.

In eleven chapters, God lays the groundwork for the redemptive work of Christ that will be required to save fallen man. This plan of redemption will intertwine itself throughout the remaining books of the Bible. Beginning with Chapter 12, we see God at work to call a chosen people, the Hebrew nation, beginning with Abram. He call this nation to be the instrument that He would use to bring Jesus Christ into the world to save man and to provide hope of forgiveness of sin and eternal life. Genesis continues with accounts of the lives of Abram's descendants and their shortcomings as individuals and as a nation, despite the covenant call on their lives. Through it all, God remains faithful to them.

Adam and Eve appear as the first created man and woman. Their named children were Cain, Abel, and Seth. Cain initiates the first act of murder against his brother Abel.

Noah remained a righteous and blameless man who walked with God in a wicked world. God called him to construct an ark in which he, his wife, and sons and daughters-in-law, could reside during the flood. Animals were spared as well. Through the preservation of Shem during the flood, the bloodline of Christ was preserved.

Through the lineage of Shem, Abram was born to Terah. God personally called Abram to "birth" the Hebrew nation -- a "great nation" -- from which Christ would be born as Deliverer for a lost and dying world. Abraham's descendants included Isaac, Jacob, and Joseph. Genesis concludes with Joseph's death in Egypt. God had placed the Hebrew nation in Egypt to prosper and grown and be subjected to great oppression. The stage had been set for Moses, the delivered of the Israelites, to step front and center.

The book of Genesis is replete with beginnings. God's inspired Word records the beginnings of the earth, all plant and wildlife, mankind, language, the Hebrew nation, and many other firsts. We also witness God's unending faithfulness to keep His Word and promises along with His provision for man, despite his sinfulness. God's wrath and His grace are portrayed throughout this book.

Genesis Scriptures that have personal spiritual meaning and inspiration for me include:

"Abram believed the Lord, and He credited to him as righteousness." Genesis 15:6

"He said, 'If I have found favor in your eyes, my Lord, do not pass your servant by.'" Genesis 18:3

"Abraham answered, 'God Himself will provide the Lamb.'" Genesis 22:8

I am blessed by the numerous references in Genesis to our Lord and Savior. Jesus was a part of God's plan for redemption of fallen man from the very beginning. Genesis 3: 15 gives us confidence in our ability to defeat the enemy through Christ's blood. And Genesis 22:8 promises that God will provide that perfect sacrificial Lamb -- Jesus Christ.

Abraham's faith and willingness to follow the Lord's directions without question, blesses me. He willingly gave himself to the Lord and His service. I offer myself to Him, through faith, for forgiveness of my sins and to equip my life to be of service to Him. I want to live my life so that I will find favor in His eyes (Genesis 18:3) and so that He will walk hand-in-hand with me through my days on earth and into eternity.